the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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