i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
