i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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