Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Randomize
