just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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