508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
