woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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