In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
