I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
