READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
