I'll bet she douches with gravy.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize