YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize
