No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
