We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
My liver just had a heart attack.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
