Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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