Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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