Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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