How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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