Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
