I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
