I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Shame is for Republicans.
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