Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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