look no pants
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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