trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
