YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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