i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
