Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
