i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
i believe in u and ur pee
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
