i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize