I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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