Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
