idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I AM VODKA MAN
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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