she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
And then he peed in my hair
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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