remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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