As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
