how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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