You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
