hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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