i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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