So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
