he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
