I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
if i can run in heels then i can drive
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
