if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
