My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
The air was thick with penises
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
