I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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