I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
