Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
