and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
i think my cat just said my name.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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