one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
