best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
