Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
