i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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